is to wake up in the afternoon (not the morning—I sleep in because I stay up late) without severe knots in my upper back. To make breakfast, eat it, and be full—not hungry an hour later. My dream is to not get nauseous. To enjoy the day without anxiety. No more anxiety. Never, ever, anxiety…
I want to go a month without acquiring some sort of infirmity. I want my miserable immune system to grow a backbone. I want to not get sick several times a year. I want to have energy and the ability to eat more. I would like to feel capable in my body, spirit and mind; To wake up and wish to take on the day, not fear it or potentially dread it.
I want what I do to aid myself to actually matter. If I succeed one day, I usually manage to fail a few days later.
Ran out of clean spoons, now I’m drinking Amoxicillin from shot glasses.
Last night, Nathan and I arrived home from our trip to Los Angeles. Shot with Scar and Keith Allen Phillips -“Lucky Bastard”- and… with Sugar and Karlos Matthews in Orange County. Nathan was the first to get shot at that shoot… -haha!- The shooting wasn’t even the highlight— I can’t come close to fully capturing in words… the prodigious experience I had staying with these certain friends. Such a loving crew and atmosphere with endless great conversation. The time was musically and intellectually stimulating. And the food? -swoon- …
I love you all! And cannot wait to visit again. :-D
…Drank milk for the first time in 4 days or so. I have somewhat accepted my health is ill-fated and shall always be at risk.